Mother’s Day Isn’t Meant to Be a Once-a-Year Thing

Mother’s Day.

A date on the calendar.
A marketing campaign.
A reminder from commercials, radio ads, and social media that we should appreciate moms.

And maybe I’m the only one…
but the older I get, the weirder that feels to me.

Not because I don’t love being celebrated.

I’m a mother of four amazing kids.
Grandma to three beautiful grandbabies.
There is truly nothing I wouldn’t do for them.

But somewhere along the way, my perspective changed.

Because if I’m honest…
I used to be the mom who thought Mother’s Day should revolve around me.

I used to put expectations on the day.
Expectations on gifts.
Expectations on how appreciated I should feel.
And yes… disappointment when it didn’t look the way I thought it should.

But age has a way of softening some things and clarifying others.

And honestly,
Letting go of those expectations relieved me emotionally in ways I didn’t expect.

Because when God said:

“Honor your father and your mother.”
— Exodus 20:12

…I don’t think He meant:
“Only on the second Sunday in May.”

Honor was never meant to be seasonal.

And love was never meant to be performative.

That’s why I see Mother’s Day differently now.

I don’t believe we should need one calendar date a year to suddenly remember to appreciate our moms.

The radio says:
“Buy flowers.”
Social media says:
“Better post your mom.”
The stores say:
“Hurry before the sale ends.”

And somehow what was meant to be meaningful can start to feel forced.
Obligated.
Guilted.
Like everyone is trying to prove they care for exactly 24 hours.

Now listen…
flowers are beautiful.
Cards are sweet.
Gifts are thoughtful.

But you know what means even more?

The random Tuesday flowers.
The unexpected phone call.
The checking in for no reason.
The helping without being asked.
The remembering all year long.

That feels like honor to me.

And moms…
Can I lovingly say something?

If your children are little, your husband is probably doing his best guessing what you’d want.
Or he’s walking through a store while your kids proudly pick out something completely random that makes perfect sense to them.

Smile.
Say thank you.

Because those little ones genuinely think they found the greatest gift in the world.

Even if it’s bright red lipstick and you don’t even wear lipstick!.

And if you want something specific.
Tell them.

People, husbands in particular, are not mind readers.

I think sometimes we set others up to fail by expecting them to magically know what makes us feel loved.

Now that my kids are older, I honestly don’t care much about gifts anymore.

Want to know my favorite thing?

Help.

I have always said, “I don’t want stuff. I want stuff done”

So I send out a project list.

Come help me move something.
Fix something.
Plant some flowers..
Organize something.

No pressure.
No timeline.
No guilt.

And randomly throughout the next few weeks one of them will show up and help me with something on the list.

That means more to me than another card or mug ever could.

But here’s the important part:

I asked for help.

I didn’t expect them to just know.

There’s a lesson in that all by itself.

And one more thing, moms…

Please stop waiting for Mother’s Day to take care of yourself.

We chose motherhood.
And yes, it is beautiful.
But it is also sacrifice.
And exhaustion.
And giving pieces of yourself away daily.

That’s part of it.

But you still matter inside of motherhood.

And self-care isn’t always what social media tells us it is.

Sometimes self-care is:

• reading a devotion for 15 minutes

• sitting outside in silence

• reading a few pages of a book

• going to bed earlier

• getting the coffee pot ready at night

• doing the dishes before bed so tomorrow feels lighter

Honestly, sometimes I call preparing for tomorrow the greatest form of self-care there is.

And sometimes you need a real break.

Ask for help.
Call a friend.
Let grandma watch the kids.
Take a day.

There is no guilt or shame in needing support.

None.

And truthfully…
I feel this same way about Valentine’s Day.
Father’s Day.
Grandparents Day — which apparently is a thing now.

We shouldn’t need a date on a calendar to remind us to love our people.

Real love shows up in the ordinary days too.

The random Tuesdays.
The ordinary moments.
The quiet ways we care for each other when nobody is posting about it online.

That’s the kind of love that lasts.

Alright beautiful friends…
until next time.

~Amy